So your milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, your curves are just the right amount of dangerous, you can make those hips swing – but what about that time you walked between desks in class and those hips knocked your crush’s books to the floor? Here are all the problems that girls with a big butt and cannot find pants that fit well have.
1. The big pants debate
You get pants to fit your waist and your thighs are ready to fight their way out of your pants. You go a size up and you get weird gaping in the back, like a kangaroo pouch.
2. Bull in a china shop
Home decor is like a cool outfit for your house – that is until your glass or new lamp is knocked to the ground because you recklessly got up without minding your booty and it took on a life of its own.
3. See right through you
You put on a pair of new leggings only to find that you can’t see through anything but where your butt is.
Whether you’re trying to take a seat in a waiting room or trying to look cute while sitting at the bar, your butt spills over the sides. And it does not matter how small you are from the waist up, there is absolutely no way you’re sharing a chair with anyone.
5. Short shorts.
Short shorts always fit you like a pair of denim underwear because your cheeks want to get OUT.
6. Moves not included
People assume that some crazy twerking abilities come with your buns, and 9 times out of 10 that is not the case.
7. Squats, or nah?
Random girls have the nerve to ask you what your workout routine is and how much you had to squat to achieve such a bodacious butt.
8. The great escape
Putting anything in your back pockets means that if you DARE to walk, your booty will slowly but surely push any object out. E.g. that one time you thought it was smart to put your iPhone in your back pocket and it was rejected.
9. Dress shopping
Shopping for dresses is a win-lose situation. Every dress that fits you great in the front is a good 3 inches shorter in the back. See: your small collection of bike shorts that save you from flashing everyone.
Getting real denim jeans on (without stretch) is like an olympic event.
11. Thongs are your savior.
Wedgies are just a reality in your life and you’ve spent countless hours trying to find the best (and most concealed) ways to get your dress, panties, and pants out of your butt crack in public.
12. Lower back probs.
Try laying down in your workout class and come to the realization your lower back hasn’t willingly touched the floor since you went through puberty.
13. Sleeping arrangements: Extra
Your pets, friends and significant others love taking a rest on it.
When people call you thick because of your booty (and the thighs needed to support it) you don’t know if it’s supposed to be taken as a compliment or not.
15. Chub rub
A thigh gap with THAT butt is very rare (lookin’ at you Beyonce) so you constantly replace your pants or have to bring them to the tailor’s to reinforce them between the thighs.
Have a cute face, little waist and a big behind? Tell us about your biggest booty complaint.